‘House’ (1-4)

What a bizarre quartet of films. They are all so vastly different from one another: different characters, plots, stories, and tone. It’s amazing that none of them connect in anyway, but all work on their own accord. The first two are certified cult classics for sure, but all four are an insanely goofy, fun time. Friday the 13th creator Sean Cunningham produced, Harry Manfredini scored them, and Kane Hodder coordinated the stunts for all 4…a nice little F13th reunion of sorts! Highly recommended viewing if you come across any of them 😘🏠

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1: A classic: Great special FX, awesome cast, and unforgettable horror villains you’ve undoubtedly seen in some respect: the big closet monster that resembles the wall creature from the original ‘Hellraiser’, the big make-up wearing zombie woman that gets chopped up by flying yard tools, and the zombie soldier that eerily resembles the body of Jason Voorhees from part 7. It’s like a weird pre-cursor to the Upside Down from ‘Stranger Things’ with the alternate realities within the house. Ya get a funny George Wendt from ‘Cheers’ playing a nosy neighbor that will certainly illicit a few laughs (also not the last Cheers character to appear in this franchise). Also, Steve Miner directed it, and he really has few misses in his career. 8.5/10

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2: Goofball, horror comedy. It’s like ‘Legend’ and ‘Labryinth’ with wild creatures, but with a strange western-style villain. Nice to see Lar Park Lincoln from F13 part 7 make an appearance as the overachieving girlfriend. The crystal skull surely is more entertaining than that god awful Indiana Jones entry. You also get Jonathan Stark from ‘Fright Night’ as the drunken friend that for some reason never leaves haha The old man from ‘Ghoulies 2’, Royal Dano, plays zombie gramps too! There’s also a weird cameo from Bill Maher and John Ratzenberger of ‘Cheers’  plays an electrician that is quite good at sword fighting 😂 The puppetry is so awesome in this one, and it certainly steals the show. Hard not to want a ‘cater-puppy’ after watching. 7.9/10

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3: Clearly just given the ‘House’ title well after the fact. Lance Henriksen always rules though, so him being the lead helps this. It’s almost identical in plot to ‘Shocker’ but with a cleaver wielding killer. This film is so vulgar with its dialog it’s almost comical haha “Fuck Me…Fuck You!” Awesome to see Terry Alexander from ‘Day of the Dead’ for a tiny bit too! 6.9/10

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4: The weakest of the films IMO, but also the most haunted house style of them all. They kill off the only recurring character from any of the films (if you want to call him that) in the first 5 minutes, which neither hurts nor helps the film haha it’s a little sluggish & boring, but hey you do get to see Kane Hodder as a talking pizza. 5.7/10